AU : Storm
by Zolo77
Summary: AU - Multi-chapter story which follows a choice made at the beginning stages of the New Republic. A choice which sets Han & Leia on an entirely new course. A little dark at times - fair warning: rating may elevate. R&R
1. Chapter 1

**"And I -I took the one less traveled by,**

**And that has made all the difference." **

**- Robert Frost **

_So, I seem to be having a little love affair with the endless possibilities which spring from the stupid-ness which is Courtship of Princess Leia (gag), don't I? First a Missing Moment, and now this. My my my! When it rains around here, it certainly pours.  
>Anyway, as a quick AN, this entirely AU; and explores the life of our favourite couple could have had if a few things gone a little... differently. I have no idea how long this will go on for, but I've got a rough outline, so have faith. This is a little out of my comfort zone, but I couldn't shake it - so here it goes.<br>Rated T for now - may escalate. Read and review - you know how much I love those.  
><em>

_Disclaimer - Not mine. But hopefully Disney can make the Universe a little bit more... happy._

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><p>The apartment was cold. Leia sat in the centre of the living room, staring out over the never-sleeping cityscape which had been her home for nearly a year. Behind her, the galley gleamed bright white from the light of the window, reflecting off the ultra-modern sleek finishes which she had never been entirely partial too.<p>

The day seemed a month long, and all she really wanted to do was curl up and sleep for years. But she couldn't, not yet. So she sat instead, cold tea forgotten in her hands, feet folded underneath her, clad in lined leggings and one of Han's old shirts. She certainly didn't look like a princess, and in that moment she didn't feel like much of one either. She glanced again - annoyed at herself for doing so - at the commlink lying beside her. It too, like the room she was waiting in, was silent. She hadn't received notification that he had landed, but then again - she swirled her tea absently - she didn't really expect to, at least, not anymore. How long had it been? Three months? It felt longer. Gone on a mission he shouldn't have been handed in the first place, they had hardly spoken to each other over the last several weeks. His campaign had pushed him deeper and deep towards the rim worlds, and communication had been sketchy at best.

As if needing him could summon him, the door slid open and Han walked through, dragging two large duffel bags along with him. He heaved a heavy sigh and dropped his baggage at the entry, kicking off his boots with a tired thud and closing the distance between them in several long strides. He reached down tenderly to kiss her - hoping to savor the usual sweet reunion of homecoming, when she grabbed him, pulling him down to her, desperate and hungry.

"I missed you." she gasped, as he half collapsed on top of her, clutching her solidly around her small frame, trying hard not to over balance completely as her hands scrambled at his back. He chuckled, moving his hands to frame her face, pulling her back slightly so he could look at her. "I missed you too. I didn't expect you to still be up."

"I wanted to wait for you."

"I'm glad." he smiled and tucked her hair back.

"I expected you earlier, did you run into trouble?" Her large eyes searching his face made him feel slightly guilty for avoiding her this afternoon.

"No, I got in earlier, just had a lot to do before I could even think of coming home." It was a half-ass lie, and she would have known that as soon as it was out of his mouth.

"Oh." she glanced down, hands twisted ever so slightly in her lap.

"But," he continued, sidling more comfortably onto the sofa beside her, and dropping his voice down to a conspiratorial whisper, "I'm not going anywhere tomorrow. And neither are you." She brightened at that, which was a little out of character. It was usually not a hard sell to keep her to himself the day after he got home, but it was usually a _sell_. She would argue - lamely - that she couldn't, that she had too much to do, that she simply wasn't able to just take time off whenever she felt like it. But none of her usual arguments were given, instead she simply sighed and leaned back into him, pulling his arms around her and breathing deeply several times.

"What is it?"

"Nothing, I'm just so happy you're home." she tucked her head under his chin.

"How was your day"

"Fine." She stiffened. "When did you get back?"

"I was planet-side by 1300, but it took a while to get everything finished up. I was back at the office by 1600-ish."

"At the office?"

He nodded, wondering at her elusive mood. He was tired, he missed her, and the last thing he really wanted to do right now was try to push her into answering the question he really needed to ask her.

"Do you want tea?" She suddenly asked, pulling out of his arms and grabbing up her cold glass from beside her where he had relegated it from her hands moments ago to the low table. Tea usually worked in getting her talking, so he nodded in agreement.

"How did the delegation go?" He called from the sofa, closing his eyes against the question. He had already seen how it had gone. He had watched as her whole body stiffened and her voice take on more of her royal accent, reserved only for times of stress and uncertainty.

"Fine. They'll be here for some time yet, though, I imagine." she hedged.

"They seemed fairly serious."

"About joining? I hope so."

"Leia-"

"Here. Tea." she announced and placed the mug into his hands.

"Leia."

She didn't answer him.

"Leia." he whispered, harder this time. Finally she looked up at him.

"Yes?" her voice was tiny, echoing still through the bleak openness of their apartment.

"I was there."

Han watched her chest expand, as if it would explode. Redness crept up her throat and she darted her eyes down to watch the steam curl and creep outwards into the air between them.

"Oh." She said at last.

"You said you would consider it." It wasn't a question. She nodded slowly. "I didn't know what else to say." Her voice was small - even to her own ears. Her brain was evading her; she had to tell him, before he pulled a classic Solo and threw something - but her mouth wouldn't form any semblance of words. She shook her head, trying to clear her thoughts. "Is that why you didn't come back here right away?"

"I just needed some space, Sweetheart. It was... a bit of a shock."

"Yeah," she spat out - angry now. "It was."

"Hey, that wasn't an easy thing to hear you know, I just-"

"You had space, Han! Three months of it! I was waiting for you tonight. Here. Alone. While you were out - what? Licking wounds without even bothering to come see me first? That's hardly fair, is it?"

"Mon said you would likely accept the offer. She was very _happy_ for you." He sat back, defensively. _That's good, Solo. Get her all riled up. That's what you really need to be doing._ His sub-conscience growled at him. He was starting to be an ass.

"Ha!" Leia laughed bitterly. "I bet she did!"

They sat in silence - a stalemate - for some time. Leia watching her tea, Han watching her. Then at long last, she raised her eyes to meet his again and he saw they were no longer angry, at least, for now, not angry at him. Instead, they were wet with tears. He felt like shit, here she was trying to talk to him about it, and he was just attacking her. Han set his mug down and sighed. He was tired. Bone tired. And all he really wanted to do was go to bed. They could deal with all of this in the morning. He was about to say as much when she blinked, two large tears tracked quickly down her cheeks, took a deep breath and spoke.

"I resigned."


	2. Chapter 2

_AN: Thanks everyone! Glad you like - R&R please. Have a good week!_

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><p>"I had to." She added quietly, staring down again at her tea. He took the mug from her - her hands cold despite the hot ceramic. "Why?" He knew why, or at least, he was pretty sure he did. But he wanted to hear it, wanted to watch her say it was for him. For them.<p>

"This isn't the government I helped build." She said simply.

They had sat looking at each other for a long while, when Leia suddenly stood and stalked towards the window.

"I will not represent something which barters so openly with peoples lives. I spend the first twenty-odd years of my life planning to pull that type of government down. I refuse to sit back and participate in one which is simply newer and shinier."

Han pushed himself up and went to her, leaning a hand on the glass over her shoulder and staring out at the city around them, he said nothing. There was so much to say. But where to start?

"So, anyway," she was quieter now, anger seeping from her as he rested a large hand on her small back. "I resigned."

"You're sure that's what you want? I know how important it is to you, Leia."

She tuned, and leaned back against the window - something she never did, it always made her feel like she was about to fall - _but_, she mused, watching his face. She had already fallen a few times today, the thought wasn't so scary anymore.

"You're important to me." she said simply and that made him smile. "And, I won't let them throw you away. Or me, for that matter - which is exactly what they are doing. Trying to ship me off to a closed up society, keep me safely tucked away in their back pocket. After everything we've been through, all we've done for _them_? _This_ is their next move? No."

She was so cute when she got all fired up over something, he thought, watching her get more and more animated as she spoke. Her small hands moving too in agitation. He was used to watching her talk like this, he had sat across from her in enough closed room meetings and beside her at too many formals dinners to be surprised by her outburst, or the calculated way she used words. But, it was always nice when it was about him, not shipping schedules or strategic troop maneuvers.

"I wont let them throw you away. And certainly I won't let them ignore who I am. This is political posturing and I won't stand for it. We've been together for four years, and they think I would even consider- it's insulting."

"Well... yeah. It is."

"I'm sorry though. I should have spoken to you about it before I did it. It was rash and selfish. I'm sorry."

"Hey-"

"No, it was. I was just so mad."

"It's okay, shhh. Hey, listen. I've been trying to pull you away from them for seven years. I don't love you because of what you do. Most of the time, I love you _in spite_ of that." This made her smile, which had been his intention. And he was right. He had tried, over and over again - mostly to annoy her - to convince her that she should pack it in and come live with him on the _Falcon_, she was a good shot, and the company was always welcome. He continued more gently, running a hand down her arm. "I just don't want you to regret it."

"I won't."

"Listen to me, Leia. I love you, but I don't want you to give this up for me - for us," he quickly corrected as she opened her mouth to interrupt him. "and hate me for it in a few years, because you could have _done_ more."

"Never. I promise. This is my choice. And they made it for me."

"Come on. Let's go to bed. I'm dead on my feet. And tomorrow, we'll figure out what else we need to do."

She let him lead her down the long hallway towards their bedroom and watched him pull his clothes off as she sat on the bed.

"What did you mean 'what else'?" She asked as he disappeared into the fresher.

"Well, the last time I checked, I was still a high ranked New Republic General."

"Yeah."

"And you're no longer a member of the Council."

"You catch on quick." She quipped and pulled his shirt over her head, crawling under the covers.

"Okay, so then what happens when I'm dispatched again?"

"Oh."

"I'm planet-side for at a minimum of two standard weeks - I read my contract," he winked at her, climbing under the cold sheets with her. "But, after that - I have no idea where I'll be or for how long. Where does that leave you?"

"I don't know." She hadn't thought of that, and said as much. He laughed quietly, pulling her next to him and sighed.

"Yeah, I know." She was too tired to argue with him, or even to pretend to be offended by the way he knew her all too well sometimes. So instead, she relaxed and let the sound of his breathing next to her lull to her sleep.

**xXx**

"This is weird."

"It would be less weird if you were still naked." He pointed out, striding slowly across the bedroom.

She rolled her eyes at him and leaned back against the headboard.

"It's weird," she continued, giving him a rather pointed look. "Because I have no where to be this morning. Oh, thank you." She took the cup of caf from him. "On on that note, you're wearing pants. How is it weird for me to wear this?" She gestured to the over-sized sweater which hung from her small frame. It had originally been his - where he had gotten it he had no idea. The letter was faded and the hem was coming apart, but she loved it. He had angrily given it to her years ago on their trip to Bespin after a fight; she had kept it ever since. He kicked the pants off and leered at her.

"Only to the kitchen and back, Sweetheart. That caf machine splatters too much for my liking. But, I suppose we wont have to worry about that for too much longer." He sighed happily and grabbed his datapad from beside him.

"What do you mean?"

"We can't stay here. These are your _appointed_ quarters and you resigned."

"Oh! I hadn't thought of that either. I did _not_ think this through. Well, I guess we'll have to move." He nodded, staring down at the pad.

"Shit."

"What?"

"We're homeless! And it's all my fault."

"We're not homeless."

"Well, we have no home. Last time I checked, Flyboy, that meant you were homeless."

"Relax."

"You would think I would be used to it, I haven't had a home in, what? Nearly seven years."

"Stop it. We're fine. And don't be ridiculous. You have a home. You have me and I have the _Falcon_. _We_ have the _Falcon_."

She made an 'aww' face and snuggled up next to him. "I hate packing."

"Then it's a good thing we don't actually own much. None of this horrible furniture is ours. The only things we have are clothes, really."

"And the glasses from the bar. And my art." She smiled. He smiled back at her. They had traveled down several levels to an underground auction house the last time he was on leave, they hadn't gone for anything in particular, but had come home with an odd-ball collection of hand crafted glassware for their bar. It was the first unnecessary thing they had ever bought as a couple, and it had given them both a sense of grounding. The glasses signified a future neither of them had ever spoke of before. And, small as they were, those glasses had given them both hope.

"Okay then, see. Nothing to worry about. You could always come and live with me in the Officer's Barracks."

"Mmm. Tempting, but... no thanks." She smirked.

"Oh come on. Lot's of guys have their girlfriends staying with them."

"You're making fun of me."

"Maybe, here, what about this place?" He handed her the datapad, pictures of a beautiful two level apartment swooshed across the screen. The rooms were bright and open, friendly and welcoming. There was a large staircase which swept up from the living area. "Does that go to the master suite?" Han nodded.

"It's lovely." He nodded again. "This isn't a rental unit."

"No, it's not." He shook his head slowly, watching her. A flutter of excited worry shot through her.

"Can we afford something like that?" She handed the pad back to him.

"Depends." He edged, dropping the battered device onto the floor.

"On?"

"Whether I stay or not."


	3. Chapter 3

_AN: Have a good weekend!_

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><p>Leia stiffened next to him and he leaned over her to grab his datapad which had been discarded from the night before.<p>

"Stay?" she questioned.

"Yeah." Han swiped across the screen of his datapad again.

"Stay where?"

"Here." He clicked a few more times.

She pushed away from him. "If I were you, Solo, I would start using more than one word answers."

"With the Republic I mean. Hey, come here." Finally turning to face her, he caught sight of a fleeting moment of uncertainly, fear and something else, something which had no place on her lovely face. He pulled her next to him. "You can't think I would leave you, Leia. We've been over this. I'm not going anywhere."

She said nothing, only tucked herself closer to him and turned her face away.

"What is it?"

"I don't know." she shrugged. Leia wasn't vulnerable often, strong and stubborn as she was; she rarely had time for vulnerability. But every so often, under the tough, beautiful exterior, a small glimpse of the woman who had lost everything, fought too hard and seen a bit too much peeked through.

"It was a shit day." It wasn't so much a statement as it was an exhausted half question. He could argue that it hadn't been - not really. That the decision she had forced on the both of them, that while massive and quickly executed, was exactly what he had hoped for the last five or so years.

Hell. He had wanted to steal her away since she cried beside him after the battle at Yavin. Young and brave, she had sat next to him, careful not to sit too close, silent tears streaming down her face. They had sat in silence. Neither wanting to ruin the small bright light of truce. A tiny momentary port in the horrible swirling storm which now threatened even larger.

They had come so far, in the last seven years. But that was the thing about storms, Han knew as he briefly kissed her temple feeling her relax further into his side, they were inevitable, powerful and creative. Destructive and blinding. And now, even here, sitting quietly with the woman he loved, Han could feel it. A tension building. It was not over yet. Not by a long shot. But at least this time, at least they knew they has each other.

**xXx**

"This is amazing. We need to go back to Kashyyyk, and soon."

"We've got nothing but time, Sweetheart. Just say the word and-" Han was cut short by the door chime. Leia shook her head resigned.

"It's Luke." she said, popping another slice of custard bread into the toaster and ran a hand down her messy half braid. Han would never let on where he managed to find her favourite childhood bread, it tasted of lazy summer days on Alderaan in the meadow, and she loved it. Especially as she was enjoying it right now, unhurried and strangely happy to do nothing - at least for the moment.

Han had wandered over to the door by the time Luke's second impatient chime tinkled through the air.

"It's all over the news." He exclaimed, clapping Han on the back in greeting. "Welcome back by the way. Go well?"

"Sure. Gave em' hell. That's all I can ask for." Han grinned that same cocky half smile he had and waved Luke through to the kitchen.

"Hey, I was just telling Han, you're all over the holonet. You made the top story on every channel I found this morning."

"Oh good." Leia swallowed another piece her honeyed custard toast. Malla's home-harvested honey; it was simply the best.

"Haven't you watched any of it?" Luke turned shocked eyes back and forth between the couple.

"Nope." Leia's toast strang up and Han stanched it before she could. Narrowing her eyes at him in mock warning she gestured to the caf machine and quirked a brow at her brother. Luke smiled and moved passed her, grabbing a mug off the glass shelving unit and pouring a glass.

"Really? I find that hard to believe. You're always glued to that thing when I come over."

Leia shrugged, a bit uncomfortably. "Well, now I don't have to be."

"I guess. Big news though. I didn't expect that when I saw the first few seconds of the report after my run this morning. You knocked me over, Leia. You sure?"

"Do you _actually_ want something, Skywalker?" She pointed her baby finger at him, biting into the breakfast balanced between her fingers - chewing like she was taking bites out of someones arm.`His, most likely, Luke knew.

"I just wanted to know you're okay, that's all."

"I'm fine."

"It's a big change." He offered softly.

"Not really." Leia pulled herself up, Political-Leia now starting to show.

"Leia. That was your _life_."

"No. It wasn't. This is my life." She pointed sharply around the room. "This; right here. And I won't have you, or anyone else try to tell me what or how I should be living it. Got it, Skywalker?" Her eyes were angry now. He has touched a nerve. A very raw nerve.

Luke nodded his head to the positive and she raised an eyebrow at both men in the small kitchen, pivoted and slowly walked away.

"She's in a very 'last name' mood today." Han offered, throwing the rest of his caf back and opening the refrigerator.

"I can see that. Have you seen any of the reports?"

"No, not yet. We'll watch them, she just..." Han trailed off, unsure how to describe to Luke exactly how he felt about all of this.

"It was bad, wasn't it?"

"I can't see how it could have been anything _but_ bad. Giving up something like that... especially for her. I don't know." He finished lamely.

"Well, the coverage is actually really good."

"Well that's something."

"And as of ten minutes ago, no one is camped outside the building. The angle seems to be more the leadership and the Hapens."

Han snarled involuntarily. "Are they at least leaving?"

"It didn't say." Luke shrugged. They were silent for a while, both lost in thought, in the crashing implications of everything which had led up to yesterday's shocking climax. Council had done this on purpose. They all saw that. But, as Han swirled the remainder of his morning drink around the wide brimmed mug, he couldn't help but wonder. If they had been able to create that plan right under his nose, what else did they have up their sleeves?


	4. Chapter 4

_AN: Have a good weekend!_

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><p>The problem, Leia mused as she finished the rest of her toast and honey in the darkness of their small shared office, watching out the window at the morning commuter traffic zipping by, was that Luke had been right.<p>

Or at least, almost right.

The Republic really had been her life. Han was always gone. Always. They had kept him from her. It was obvious then and it was blatantly obvious now. It hurt too, now that she knew why they had done what they did. Keeping her as the bargaining chip tucked securely up their sleeve, the council had mildly tolerated her 'affair' with Han.

She snorted angrily. Affair indeed. In the reflection of the large city, she could see the redden angry face of General Dordonna standing in front of her, spouting off about honour and duty and the safety of the galaxy and the Republic and whatever else he could think of to throw in her face. Offhandedly belittling her relationship with Han, a relationship which had continued regardless of the hurdles which were thrown in the way of it - for the last five years. One of - if not the most difficult and fundamentally important pieces of her life. Affair. Yes. That pretty well summed up the Council's opinion of her and Han. Dirty and sordid. Something to entertain for a while until a better offer come around.

She could also see Mon's white ashen countenance in the glass in front of her. "I know, Leia." She had said. Leia drew a quick breath in blinking to shatter the vision of her mentor standing to her side, feigning sympathy and understanding. Mon had never taken to Han. Never in the five years she had been with him had Mon tried to hide her dislike, her contempt even. She didn't know, nor did she care. _Lies_. Some dark small voice inside Leia's heart whispered to her. It was seductive, the soothing whispers, deep and calming. Pressing against her already frail wall of self-doubt and insecurity, begging to be released a little further... to allow herself to feel angry, betrayed even. These were colleagues. Friends. People she trusted. Comrades she had bled with.

False allies - all of them. Her chest heaved, and her mind clouded darkly.

They had _used_ her. The darkness pressed forward a fraction further, swirling in a small vortex inside her heart. Powerful and seductive. They had all _lied_.

"No." Leia said to her reflection after a moment, pressing the dark back inside herself quickly, ashamed and scared of what she had just touched. "It doesn't matter any longer. I'm free." She whispered, the words sounding too loud and far too large in the small room.

Free.

Was this how Han had always felt? This terrific sense of overwhelming freedom? It was unsettling but at the same time, oddly comforting.

She hadn't been free in... she frowned. Perhaps she had never been truly free.

For the first time, she stood at the centre of her own life.

"So, now what, Princess?" she muttered to herself.

"I could offer a few suggestions, if you like." Leia smiled and turned. He was close to her, standing an arms length away, fingers casually hooked into his pockets, sly grin on his face. She didn't reply. Content for the moment to simply watch him. She hadn't heard him approach, lost as she had been a moment ago in her own fragile future.

"Luke's gone." He finally said, words soft - as if speaking to an injured creature, which she supposed she was in a way. A small, sad creature who had just been cast out of something she loved. No, that wasn't right. Not cast out. Outmaneuvered. That was it. Her strategy had been wrong from the start. She had allowed them to look upon her and him with contempt, disdain and reticule. She had accepted their dislike and choose to live with it, instead of fighting for change. Maybe she had been tired of fighting. Maybe she had convinced herself it didn't really matter what they thought. Maybe she had tricked herself into not worrying about it.

Han had known. He had been on the receiving end of scorn for so many years. And through all of it, he had never pushed her into action on his behalf. Never was he outwardly angry or annoyed or even hurt. He was hers. And perhaps that _was_ really all that mattered.

She stared at him for a moment longer. Tracing the lines she knew so well. Han cocked his head at her slightly, gently questioning her silence.

"I don't know what to do." She whispered, as if unveiling a tremendous deep secret. The unsettling feeling of that dark lusty voice still hung heavily in her chest. Leia had thought she had come to a tentative type of truce with her heritage, with the unsavory truth of it all. Luke had a way of looking at it which she would never have - a positive wistful vision of what his life was like. It would never be that way for her. But in her own way she had managed to carve out a small acceptance for it. Now however...

"Me neither," he replied softly. It wasn't a helpful response, but at the same time Leia was relieved. It made her feel very much less alone, interrupting her downward thoughts and pulling her back to what really was important. But then, she always felt that way with him.

"It's not over, is it?" she sighed, sliding into the armless office chair, curling her legs underneath herself. Han chuckled. "You mean, do I think they'll just let you go? No. I don't. Not without a fight."

"I'm tired of fighting," sliding a hand across her neck and looking again out the large window. She was tired. Bone-tired. They both were.

"Leia." he snapped her attention back to the determination set firmly across his features. He came to crouch in front of her, taking her hands in his and squeezing firmly. "I will always fight for you. If this is what you truly want."

A lone tear slid down her cheek. Of course he would. He would always fight for her. They hadn't cared about that, about them. She wasn't important enough to her own people for them to take this moment into consideration. He squeezed her hands again. "What do you want, Leia?"

"You." She answered quickly, simply. Echoing her words from that late night on Bakura, when he stood behind her, posing the same question. She had been scared that night. Not of him. But of what they would mean to each other, of having something that couldn't be stolen away, something beyond tangible knowledge that she was loved.

He smiled then, releasing a breath she hadn't noticed he had taken, and pulled her to her feet, kissing her forehead. "Alright. First thing's first. We need a new home."


End file.
